Good-bye

Hi Folks,
I am back from my retreat and have decided to stop blogging, I,m not sure if its forever, or just for a while.

The reason I started blogging, was due to certain problems with my partners film business, I had to leave what I had been doing for 15 years ( intuitive counseling)and put all my time and energy into changing the structure of the existing business, and also branching it into a new one.

I have been working on this full time for about 2 years now, and it is now stable, and the new one is ready to roll.
I also had to drop my prison rehab programs, my Indian orphanage program, and various workshops and groups I used to run.

This again isn't a whinge, just what had to be done.

So I felt very lonely.The world of SFX, and the military, whilst very interesting, didn't really have a lot of "me" there..So I started reaching out to others through the Internet.
It was a medium for me to express the parts of me that weren't being expressed in my day to day life.

The 'others' I met are a diverse bunch of people who have stunned me with their awareness, kindness, intelligence, humour, spirituality and compassion ( yes, You Guys) who's loving support I have felt and treasured from across the miles that separate us, and I have also made some deep personal friends along the way.

However the cyber world has been gradually taking over for a while now, and its time for me to withdraw from it and get back into what I need to do.

To all my much, much loved blog buddies out there, email me if you feel like it, and I want to say thank you, I love all of you, and if I am ever in your part of the world, or you mine, lets meet up and "do lunch".

I wish you all the very best this life has to offer,
Love Enigma

A Foxes Tail

I am going away for a few days, to work on getting a few more tails.

I leave you all in the safe and wise hands of Gingatao.

The Law

The sun may be clouded, yet ever the sun
Will sweep on its course till the cycle is run.
And when into chaos the systems are hurled,
Again shall the Builder reshape a new world.

Your path may be clouded, uncertain your goal;
Move on, for the orbit is fixed for your soul.
And though it may lead into darkness of night
The torch of the Builder shall give it new light.

You were, and you will be; know this while you are:
Your spirit has traveled both long and afar.
It came from the Source, to the Source it returns;
The spark that was lighted eternally burns.

From body to body your spirit speeds on;
It seeks a new form when the old one is gone;
And the form that it finds is the fabric we wrought
On the loom of the mind with the fibre of thought.

From cycle to cycle, through time and through space,
Your lives with your longings will ever keep pace.
All that you ask for and all you desire
Must come at your bidding, as flames out of fire.

You are your own devil, you are your own God.
You fashioned the paths that your footsteps have trod.
And no one can save you from error or sin
Until you hark to the spirit within.

Ella Wheeler Wilcox, 1850-1915

A Miserable Life (back as a reminder)

Here are some handy tips to guarantee that your life is as miserable as it can possibly be

*Constantly think and talk about the past, preferably all the negative things. Even the positive things are a great way to make you feel miserable, they are gone, who knows if they will ever happen again.

*Define yourself by your age.

*Always be right.

*Never inquire into your thought processes, that would undo being right.

*Have most of your conversations revolve around what someone else did, and don't forget to judge them accordingly.

*Take everything, absolutely everything, including the weather, personally.

*Use the expressions "it isn't fair, and this shouldn't have happened" whenever something goes wrong and always find something to blame, including yourself

*Compare yourself to other people, positively or negatively , it doesn't matter which.

*Learn to react quickly , subjectively and emotionally to whatever happens .

*Cultivate the philosophy "if your not with me, your against me".

*Never forget who has hurt you, the first tip helps enormously with this.

*Treat your children and your partners as extensions of yourself.

*Expect people to think and feel exactly like you, and react with justified anger when they don't.

*React with even more anger when they do all of the above.

*Always do what you think is expected of you, never tell people how you really feel and then blow up in justifiable anger at how they are abusing you.

*Get into the habit of generalizing and putting people in boxes

*Expect people and life to never change.

*Use as your favourite expression "this is the way I am and I cant help or change it".

*Be defensive and evasive, after all if your honest, you, ll give the game away.

*Think that if someone loves you, they know what you are thinking and feeling.

*Spend hours trying to work out what someones motive is , come up with your own ideas, and treat them accordingly.

*Make sure that you are never kind or purposely back down from a fight with someone you don't like, it shows weakness.

*Cut people out of your life who don't agree with you.

*Blame everything in your life on external events, and when someone refuses to treat you as a victim, get really angry and call them unsupportive.

*Never learn anything new or meet different people.

*Surround yourself with people who actively practice these tips as a way of life, this helps perfect it . Remember misery loves company.

*Expect people to do things on your time frame.

*Pick unavailable romantic partners , be with them for years, use all of the reasons above why you cant leave them, and then do it all over with someone new.

*Regard every new relationship as "The One'.

*Have set rules, regulations and expectations on the relationship, if they don't fulfill them , ditch them , they weren't "The One", this nicely validates all the other techniques.

These are just a few handy hints, but even if you only do a few of them, a miserable life is guaranteed. And the beauty of this is it can only get worse.

Try it for two weeks, and if you don't feel like total shit by that time you can get your money back.

Enjoy

The Kitten Gets It!

Who will save Table Wabbit?

This is the last of the rescued kittens, we have called her "Table Wabbit" as she is really soft and fluffy like a rabbit. The other 2 went to good homes together a few weeks ago.

We are making a poster up saying that the kitten gets it in 2 weeks if we cant find a home for her.

The feral mum had another litter last week, 6 of them.
I will be de- sexing the little tramp as soon as possible.

Mother and babies are doing well, I'm rather frazzled with 10 cats.

My Immortal

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

[CHORUS:]
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

[Chorus]

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

Where its at.

Understanding men, and people in general is really simple, you just realize that you will never really know where someone else is at.

Why? Because you are not them. Its an impossibility to know fully and completely where someone else is at. Its that simple.

You can only know your ideas of them.

Understanding where you are at is the important thing, everything else naturally falls into place once this is worked out.

(The Gingatao Dancers)From Princess Lakota

I have stolen this from Princess Lakotas site, I found it too hysterically funny to keep hidden in the back room, and also Princess is so talented at putting this sort of thing together, it should be shared *raises glass to Princess*

This was in response to a strange comment tangent that myself, Jo ,and Princess danced of with on Gingataos site.
Paul, you know you've really made it when you have a dance troupe named after you

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